Artist Lecture, Ulrich, Kerry McDonnell

Gurnee, IL 2003 (of Copia-Retail), Film Photograph, Brian Ulrich, 2003

Granger, IN 2003 (of Copia-Retail), Film Photograph, Brian Ulrich, 2003

Kenosha, WI 2003 (of Copia-Retail), Film Photograph, Brian Ulrich, 2003

Brian Ulrich’s images speak for themselves. I found I was much more interested in his processes and the stories of his travels than his actual conceptual ideas behind the imagery. I absolutely understand his reasoning about consumerism equating patriotism after such events like 911 and the American public’s sort of- addiction-to shopping and the depression or sadness they hope it will relieve; then the purge of guilt afterwards, resulting in thrift shops. Ulrich easily made his points but the content of his images rang through his explanations, which I think he was very aware of, as he didn’t go into great depth about his conceptual means and kind of let the images do the talking.

I had a profound interest in the subject matter, which I believe was one of his goals. The fact that he shoots in such large formats really assists the audience in micro-analyzing and observing these spaces, and in cases where people are involved, their interaction with or role in the space. In his “chapter” Retail he discussed the products shot in these stores as becoming just as important or just as representative as the public. Companies and manufacturers create these products that will appeal to the public, and they do-they sell. Looking at these images is like looking at a self-portrait. The fact that we buy into these manufactured, consumerist ideas tells us exactly who we are as a society or as individuals.

His work in Thrift did feel like it was missing something. He mentioned that he is not one to point fingers, and his images did no such thing, but there is some kind of disconnect from the images. While they’re interesting to analyze, they haven’t quite been taken to the next level where a clear statement could be derived. Perhaps, because I know the images of people are staged, the images are thrown slightly and they seem less legitimate. That may be a shallow observation but I feel like when he had a great intention to obtain these “street” photographs of people in places he may not have supposed to be in makes the work seem that much more worth it. I suppose in Thrift it’s because of a lack of struggle.

Artist Website/Blog

Idea Blog for 10/15

Well, midterms are around the corner and after having a quick talk today with Tom I can definitely say I feel a lot more confident in my work thus far. All that’s left is to work out the rest of the kinks in my concept and get everything printed.

For quite some time I’ve felt that this work has been forced, perhaps because I am creating in ways I never have before and coming out with a product completely different from my usual work. I was nervous starting this process and wasn’t entirely convinced by it. I spent hours researching, trying to find information to back up my claims. Though getting caught up in the details isn’t necessarily a bad thing, I wound myself up to the point where I was having trouble separating the details in talking about my work. Now that I’ve calmed down a little I can go back and sift through everything I’ve collected and reconsider their meanings in reference to my work.

While roaming Google I came across a book called Self-Identity and Everyday Life by Harvie Ferguson. In his chapter Interruption: Memory he references a quote by Michael de Montaigne-

“…it was so long ago that I cannot remember anything about myself then.”

You’d never see me more thrilled. Here I had been struggling with finding information about loss of memory as a loss of self and here it is! While it’s obviously not stated directly in this quote, it is beautifully implied. While the reading in this specific excerpt is incredibly dense, it’s very interesting and incredibly profound.

“And because memory is always a present experience it is absolutely bound to the flow of time. A memory I am going to have tomorrow will not arrive until that moment; a memory I had yesterday is already in the past and, while I recollect having it, cannot be revisited. But, whenever it comes, and in a remarkable way, memory is completely free from the temporal constraint of immediate experience. We play over the entire range of possible past experiences in recollecting events and incidents; free from the ordering of time’s original flow. And, in fact, we can exercise some limited control and direction over memory and use it deliberatively.” (By the author, 2^nd paragraph of the chapter).

I was struggling with the continuation of each piece after the moth makes itself present. In retrospect, I have an incredibly easy time considering these “memories” as free from time’s flow. I like that the moth exists within a space or a “memory” whose “beginning” and “end” are not entirely certain. It exists as a lapse where no certain beginning and end are defined. The change in focus between background and foreground, between moth and memory, reference no specific point and therefore can exist at any “time” within the memory. I also see the moth’s undulating form as relating to mood swings. There is no explanation for how a mood is changed, or no specific point where one can reference a change in mood. It’s a gradual change over time which is perfectly illustrated by the swinging of focus.

Another wonderful quote that helped me ground my concept is taken from the same book:

“It is not Romantic striving or self-realization that actualizes the self; rather it is a recollection of the past for which the present is the culmination.”

Reading this only reinforces my ideas that a loss of memory correlates a loss of self. The awareness of one’s past allows one to exist as who they are in the present. If parts of one’s past are forgotten, could you not agree that part of oneself has been lost along with the memory?

Self Identity and Everyday Life

Artist Blog 10/12

Placement (Moon Ocean) 2007, 14x20.5", Photograph, Julianne Swartz, 2007

Placement (Dark Hand) 2007, 14x18", Photograph, Julianne Swartz, 2007

Placement (Two Moons) 2007, 14x20.5", Julianne Swartz, 2007

Julianne Swartz’s work in Placement is a series of photographs showing a hand holding a mirror that reflects the opposite horizon of which the viewer is facing. She does not comment very specifically about this piece (or any of her photographic work, for that matter.) An article I found by Mixed Greens, an online gallery, gives some insight as to how Swartz operates as an artist and the surface themes of her work. Flatly, she creates work where the extraordinary can co-exist with the mundane. She enjoys the juxtaposition of opposing ideas such as mysterious vs. apparent or beautiful and banal (MG). Swartz “takes photographs to capture that experience within a daily context.” She continues stating that she waits for the instant when the light in its shifting form allows the ordinary to become the remarkable (MG). What I enjoy about the work in Placement, and Swartz’s other work, is that she finds a method to materialize intangible elements such as light, sound, and/or air into atmospheric substances that one could experience physically—substances that you could hold in your hand.

I find her work in Placement as disruptive, yet enlightening. Conceptually, the obvious would be that hand and mirror are disrupting the audiences’ immediate view. While doing so, the viewer is interested in what is being reflected by the mirror and its displacement within the image. As a whole, the mirror acts as some sort of portal; perhaps a reminder of the past or a glimpse of the future, the blurred and silhouetted hands serving as the synaptic gaps between the past and future (the present space and the space represented in the mirror). I suppose one could relate it to the black matter that exists in space. I find the stronger images are those that have a busier chromatic space reflected in the mirror, while the background of the immediate space is much less detailed and monotone. The idea presented here is that one could reach out and grab the space existing in the mirror, as the shape of the mirror is not precisely defined; the image within the mirror forms to however the hand is holding it. I almost feel like the space being reflected could exist and manifest itself within the subject. This reminds me of a beautiful quote I once read: “I am a part of the Universe, and the Universe is a part of me.” Her work in Placement transcends that of existing space and gives rise to questions relating to the experience of intangible elements. It questions our ability to grasp and understand these elements simply by displacing a space within another in a form it is not commonly observed.

Artist Website

Mixed Greens Feature

Idea Blog for 10/08

I posted these in the class blog for critique:

Find them larger here: 1 2 3

My concept has progressed into something I’m still not quite grasping entirely. I think I’ve pretty much moved away from the concept of the moths as a metaphor for the effects my parents relationship has on me. At this point I’m juggling 2 ideas:

1.) I personally relate moths to memory, and I have been getting really hung up on trying to find research to back up my claim. However, the symbolism of moths is subjective-everyone is going to have their own view of what a moth relates to. It is my job as an artist to communicate why (and how) I relate moths to memory and challenge the viewer to look past their superficial or initial interpretations of what a moth is. My condensed concept is: I relate moths to memory (in this case, as an interruption of memory). An interruption of memory is an interruption of self-one loses pieces of their own identity along with the memories or pieces of memories they’ve forgotten. I plan on experimenting with inserting myself in the frame, though perhaps through a reflection, and use the moth to interrupt the “memory” as well as my figure.

Questions: I suppose this is interchangeable, but, the moths not only “interrupt” the viewers’ POV, but they obstruct the subject matter as well. Will taking the photograph as though from my (or the viewers’) POV be enough to communicate an interruption of self?

2.) The idea that immediately comes to mind when looking at this work is the general confusion which, due to some kind of event, suddenly dissipates for a few moments and after which that time has passed, one settles back into confusion and the clarity is forgotten. I am interested in capturing/illustrating those moments just before and just after “clarity” or “realization” for reasons simply relating to length. After I experimented with length or “time” of each series, I decided that keeping the series shorter rather than longer will be more effective. I got bored looking at the longer series because the composition doesn’t change as drastically. I noticed that if I keep the series shorter I am more inclined to examine each image carefully AND view the entire piece as the composition changes more drastically between frames. In this case, the viewer will feel that they have much less “time” to spend with each image before moving to the next; for they may have missed an event in the last frame. The viewer will have to keep up with the piece rather than peruse it. I am also very interested in the language and message that is communicated by shooting into different light sources or portals (windows/doorways). Perhaps the light could set the mood of the piece.

Link to related critique blog post

Artist Lecture, Umbrico, Kerry McDonnell

A majority of Umbrico’s work focuses on the photography and set design of goods photographed in Home catalogues. What I found surprisingly interesting was her point about the voyeuristic qualities of the photos taken for these magazines. For instance one of her pieces displays cutouts of “casually flung clothing.” Who exists in these spaces? Are they coming back? Where did they go? More specifically-what “props” do they interact with? Asking these questions all of a sudden makes these spaces much more mysterious and scintillating. Another point she made was in reference to books being used for things other than their original purpose. She showed us many clips of books being used as pedestals for other objects. This degrades the object and discards any meaning or identity of its original purpose, which I find quite insulting.

We are taking a business practice class this semester which covers a lot about copyright. When Umbrico presented Suns From Flickr, she discussed the matter of ownership of photos uploaded to online domains. Having had an issue with this piece and the viewer’s misunderstanding of appropriation, she argued that if an image is put up online, it’s basically public domain and that perhaps the original photographer is seen as having very little claim to any of his/her images. She pointed out that, while these pictures of sunsets were taken individually by many, many people, they were all (in a wider scope) taking part in a collective effort or group activity to photograph this particular time of day. Having had that idea introduced to me I suddenly felt incredibly hypocritical as an artist.

Umbrico’s work is immediately inaccessible and does require titles and/or explanation. That said, I thought she was very well spoken. I had familiarized myself with her work before the lecture, so that may have helped me better follow what she was speaking about. She was pretty casual and modest in her delivery, which may sound weird but it helped me relax and sort of open up to whatever she was describing. What I find wonderful about Umbrico’s work is that she makes these small anecdotes (such as her father wanting her to find a plate online, or her mirror breaking) into larger concepts, yet goes about executing them fairly simply. Her method of collection seems therapeutic and enjoyable and it comes through in her work as well as when she speaks. There is a very obvious passion for what she creates.

http://www.penelopeumbrico.net/

Artist Blog 10/05

“Memory plays a major role in the construction of my pictures. Objects and places that I photograph are usually drawn from past memories and experiences. When I capture the environment, I am conscious and deliberate in my decisions to frame it not just to have a record per se but for the pictures to be viewed as something that holds meaning. This in turn encourages viewers to actively engage in their own recollections.”

-Stella Kalaw

I draw a lot of inspiration from Kalaw’s imagery, as well as her writing. In her series Family Spaces she speaks about the loss of the meaning of family as she has assimilated American life, having immigrated here from the Philippines. The images in this series, being presented in succession to another, give the idea that they are all one home, when in fact they are lives lived in 4 different time zones. In this series she presents her struggle to accept the separation of her family. She photographs personal belongings in an aesthetic that suggests solitude and emptiness.

Cubao focuses on spaces of her grandparents’ house and home. Much of the same concept applies here, as well as the same aesthetic. Even having spent a lot of time with her grandparents, Kalaw had very few memories of the space. Though, once visited, many memories she had forgotten resurfaced. A House Remembered, again, follows the same concepts of family and home. Kalaw photographs her home here in the U.S. and writes about her son’s experiences compared to her own when she was a child in the Philippines and how she regrets her son cannot grow up the same way.

Because I feel like my images that I posted on the critique blog of my most recent individual meeting are a little too ambiguous, I am still considering using a documentary style to give those images space. As Shannon pointed out, this imagery may become too mysterious—they somehow need to be grounded. Again, I’ve been researching photographers who work in a documentary style and focus their aesthetic on capturing things having to do with the home and the family. I pay close attention to lighting, color and detail, all in my effort to explore other ways of photographing spaces familiar to me so that my work does not become repetitive.

http://www.kalaw.com/

http://slashmaraud.blogspot.com/2008/09/interview-with-photographer-stella.html

http://stellakalaw.blogspot.com/

Idea Blog for 10/01

Is it really terrible that I’m having such a hard time motivating myself to do anything? And I mean anything. I went home this past weekend, full of hope that I’d come back to school with something amazing. Instead, I had a horribly exhausting weekend at home with very little satisfying production. I spent my entire Saturday and Sunday photographing and I’m not pleased with any of it. Usually, I’d use my frustration with my parents as a guide to help me focus on my work. I’d channel it so that I could create work that meant something to me, and that would legitimately and genuinely communicate how I’m feeling. But now I only feel drained. I’m exhausted emotionally and physically and no matter where I’m taking photographs (yes, even at home) I am stuck. I try to relax and I can’t. I try to open up and not think too hard about what I’m photographing. I experiment, but everything that comes out of that says nothing to me. Perhaps I’m just incredibly disillusioned. Perhaps I’m starting to feel like I’m intentionally putting myself through the gauntlet so that my work comes across legitimately. I feel like I’m losing touch with myself as an artist. I’m losing control of what I’m doing in all aspects of my life. It is such a task to gather myself enough so that I can sit and think clearly. There are so many things going on and I’m having a very, very difficult time concentrating on my work with all this going on, on top of the pressure I feel to produce for this class. I’m going to vent, whether anyone likes it or not.

My parents are still feuding through myself, Michael and Hayley. They mutter accusations under their breath thinking we can’t hear them. They say the other is “planting ideas in our heads,” taking their frustrations about one another out on us. They have no shame. They put us on guilt-trips. I don’t feel like arguing. I don’t have the energy to challenge their point. I’m not heard, anyway-they don’t listen, thinking I’m acting/speaking on part of the other. So, I have to give in and take it. I let them accuse me of things I have no control over, they complain to me about the other like there’s something I can do about it. They say they don’t mean it that way. I’m too tired to care, yet I do and it hurts. I just wish everyone would stop arguing, nagging, speculating. I can’t find any space to relax without feeling guilty about it. Richmond sucks, home is falling apart. I don’t know what to do with myself.

My dad lives in an apartment down the street from my house; literally, a 2 minute walk. I am the only one that visits him, and I visit him out of the guilt-trips he puts me on and because I feel bad for him. My brother and sister don’t return his calls or his texts and he often doesn’t see them for 2-3 weeks at a time, and even then, it’s only for an hour or so when my mom makes them go over there. He complains about this to me like I’m supposed to do something about it. He and I both know that I am the only consistent person between him and the rest of my family, so he tells me these things so that I’ll be the messenger and take it back to the house. When I bring this up he accuses me of being defensive and “ridiculous.”

My parents cannot be under the same roof.

My dad didn’t come to my 21^st birthday party that my family and friends threw for me.

When you’re wrung like this it’s hard to recollect. I should be able to focus all this into my work like I’ve always done, but something is stopping me short. I tell myself it’s all in my head, and maybe it is, but it doesn’t feel that way. It would be so nice to blame all of this on myself so that I could realize and overcome my ridiculousness and move on. But I am unreservedly lost and perplexed within a vacuum of things I cannot control.

“But even as I felt crushed and broken -- walking around the neighborhood in a fog, trying to grasp what was happening, unable to listen to music or watch TV or go to the movies but only able to stare at the wall in the evenings as the information sifted into me, grain by grain -- the first of many dim and distant inklings of light was the idea that I was understanding, for the first true time, what people mean when they say that we do not know the future.” (Excerpt from May Through September [by] Aimee Bender)

Edit:

Much better. I apologize if that was inappropriate. However, having divulged all that, I can think a little clearer. Hopefully, Tom or Jeff (or both!) can help me condense all of it and channel it into something productive, as the divorce has become more distracting than it is useful. I've never told anyone the gritty details of the divorce and by doing so I seriously hope either instructor, as well as my peers, will have a better idea of how to help me focus and organize my concept/work.